Emotional armouring

Psychological armouring

A common hurdle to recovery: emotional (or psychological) armouring has the potential to not only negatively impact an individuals future relationships and inner psyche; but produce a plethora of related physiological symptoms within the body.

Armouring refers to a maladaptive coping method whereby a survivor of trauma holds back or represses natural emotions or expressions in order to conform to expected societal norms. Over time, armouring results in an altered character which manifests as a coping mechanism in defense from pain experienced due to not expressing ones inner desires. The conflict between our basic needs/desires or feelings becomes heightened with unnatural attitudes and conditioning placed upon us.

Armouring is a common tool used by survivors of early developmental trauma and adult interpersonal relationship trauma and many survivors may use this without the realisation of the fact. When armouring manifests in to a survivors inner character, it causes a range of effects with regards to one’s personality, physiological systems and desires (Personal dreams, goals, wants, needs etc).

Emotional body armouring forms in response to chronic trauma; the fracture of a relationship or the disintegration of one’s values. For adult survivors of Childhood abuse or neglect (and cases of adult interpersonal relationship trauma); armouring can become deeply enmeshed within one’s developed characteristics. This is to state that neural pathways may have been forged in a way that would not have been. It is not to say that such pathways cannot be altered.

Adult survivors of Childhood developmental trauma may have been punished during times of self expression. The potential is that self expression which is not deemed appropriate or acceptable by an abuser may be termed so because it creates feelings of deep insecurity and lack of control within the abuser(s). When this fear is met with a lack of perceived control, it causes a heightened reactive response. That is in no way to say that an abusers actions are deemed acceptable or normal, as an adult they are just as responsible as others (including ourselves) to react appropriately and without abuse. Each time a survivor may have attempted to express their needs or desires, this cycle is most likely to have been repeated and so the child (or adult) becomes conditioned in to learning not to express, not to feel and not to show weakness.

We know the mind and body are connected; dis-EASE of the mind leads to DIS-EASE of the body systems. Repressed feeling that commonly accompanies emotional armouring is seen to be stored within body systems and thus seen to manifest as tightness, tension or illness.

Armouring is an accumulative process and as time passes; the addition of further dis-Ease plagues the survivor in the form of chronic pain, fybromialgia, hip/joint issues, jaw issues, shoulder and muscle spasms.

The psoas is the largest hip mover of the body. It is the muscle that moves our legs to run (fight/flight) and to draw our knees up to go into the fetal position (freeze). For people with C-PTSD or PTSD the psoas becomes shorter and tight because it’s never allowed to relaxed due to the sympathetic nervous system being always in fight/flight/freeze. Which leads to lower back pain, hip pain, and inner and outer thigh pain, knees, pain in the glutes, and possibly even difficulty breathing because the diaphragm is impacted by the psoas muscles.

Learning to relax the SNS (sympathetic nervous system) will help to relax the psoas muscle. Learning to relax the psoas muscle may also contribute to relaxing the SNS.

Breathe work, visualization techniques, along with somatic yoga practices will help release, relax, strengthen, and lengthening the psoas muscles will help alleviate back, glutes, hips, legs, and knees and improve the breath. Learning to relax the body and move from the sympathetic nervous system to the parasympathetic nervous system. The parasympathetic nervous system is responsible for our bodies ability to rest and digest. More information regarding recovery of the psoas can be found within our group.

Focusing awareness to the body sensations associated may help when practicing feeling and reducing armouring behaviors. Recovery from armouring requires body and breathe work as well as relaxation and cognitive skills/therapy or support.

More information about the intricacies of armouring can be found on our group.

Repressed memories

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Individuals who have experienced trauma in the developmental period or within adult interpersonal relationships may find one of the most difficult aspects to recover is forgotten (or repressed) memories.

Research has shown there to be two types of forgotten memory; those that are consciously blocked by the individual; and those that are subconsciously forgotten as a protective measure from our brain. The latter of which generally involves a deep trauma and causes the brain to drop the memory into a “non-conscious zone”.

Memory repression is a controversial area which is still debated to this day. Originating from Freud in the late 1800s; we see the belief that memory repression is a defence mechanism against traumatic events. Freud believed that those individuals who showed signs of having set symptoms with no clear cause were actually suffering from repressed memories. Individuals suffering from memory suppression had no memory of the trauma(s) however experienced set body symptoms which suggested an underlying subconscious thought.

This causes controversy as many theorists within the field believe that memory is highly flawed and completely subject to individual bias and perception. Memories are formed by this bias; how we felt in the moment and how we felt emotionally at the time. Personally, this notion leads one to believe that in cases of complex trauma and developmental trauma; as personal emotions worsen during these relationships; instances of abuse are thus compounded due to the already abused psyche holding extreme negative emotion at the time of trauma.

Memories are still useful in exploring accompanied psychological issues however, one should be aware that the perception of these memories may have been heightened or in some cases unduly subdued through dissociation at the time of trauma.

Repressed memories are stored deep within the body, construction of this concept has led to many trauma-informed theorists adopting the belief that working with the body can be beneficial in healing from trauma; especially trauma that has been purposely forgotten.

Professor Van Der Kolk stated that unpacking suppressed memories in an attempt to remember them may not in fact be as useful as once thought with regards to healing trauma.

In contrast to this, Theorists who believe regaining ones memory to be beneficial to recovery and so offer repressed memory therapy.

Repressed memory therapy is designed to access and recover past memory in an effort to releive unexplained symptoms which accompany trauma. Practitioners of this often use a variety of techniques such as hypnosis and guided imagery to aid the recovery of repressed memories.

Approaches to this include;

• Primal therapy
• Sensorimotor psychotherapy
• Somatic transformation therapy
• Brainspotting
• Neurolinguostic programming
• Internal family systems therapy

However, science-based research and evidence doesn’t support the effectiveness of these approaches due to the unintended consequences they bring.

Approaches to recover memory often result in an individual constructing false memories to replace the void. Such memories created through suggestion by therapies can actually cause a plethora of new issues to arise.

Not only do they have a hugely negative impact on the trauma Survivor; but the individuals who may be implicated as a result.

There are various ways in which a survivor of trauma may not hold the memory they seek. In cases of trauma occurring in childhood, simple age may be a factor; dissociation is often used by child survivors in order to withstand parental abuse whilst remaining emotionally attached to said figure(s). This detachment; also used in adult complex trauma, can blur or block the memory of event. It has also shown to be common in instances of Childhood emotional neglect (CEN) where the child may dissociate until they are emotionally equipped to deal with said memory.

In instances of child abuse or neglect; memory may take different meaning and make more sense later in life either due to life experience or therapeutic support. In such cases of realising the significance of an event or memory; it can be common for the now adult survivor to rexperience the trauma and be presented by an acute onset of trauma symptoms as a result.

Some additional symptoms which could be present due to unresolved trauma include;

• Insomnia, fatigue, nightmares
• feelings of doom
• Tense, aching muscles
• Stomach distress, GI issues
• Chronic pain
• Concentration/memory difficulties
• Confusion
• Anger
• Anxiety
• Depression
• Low self esteem
• Obsessive or compulsive behaviour
• Secondary manifestations of mental illness (eating disorders, OCD, generalised anxiety, agoraphobia etc)

It is important to note that a therapist should never “coach” you through memory recall, nor should they suggest any abuse experienced (a good trauma informed therapist should be unbiased).

Experts do not know enough about memory yet and so are unable to distinguish a real experience from a false memory unless evidence supports said recovered memory. The APA (American psychological agency) suggest that recovery of memory is rare and that one should treat the body in an attempt to release the effects of past unresolved trauma.

Professor Van Der Kolk is – in my opinion; at the forefront of trauma informed treatment methods which are multidimensional; taking care of not just the mind, but the body too. His work; “The body keeps the score” is seminal reading for trauma survivors who have stored unresolved trauma in their body.

As the body is said to keep a physical memory of all of your experiences; it can be helpful to remind oneself that although your mind has repressed this event; your body has not. Thus working within your body to release trauma seems to be the most effective way of doing so (also the safest as it reduces the risk of retraumatization).

As we age: we naturally forget. Memories will naturally fade. If we spend our entire adult lives seeking a truth that may never come to fruition; we begin wasting time on a quest that can be completed by looking within our bodies.

The body does not forget. memories are stored there, at times we must Trust our minds protection and although difficult as it may be, I do not think memories are required to be recovered in order to continue to heal.

Our Facebook group contains valuable resources in order to help your body recover including; trauma release exercise examples and resources on Professor Van Der Kolk’s book: the body keeps the score. In rejecting the notion that we must process and remember past unresolved trauma; we free our minds and allow it to progress along the recovery journey.

Trauma blocking

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Survivors of Childhood developmental trauma and adult interpersonal relationship trauma often feel the need to block or forget past traumatic experiences. What is a normal reaction to abnormal experiences; and can result in many instances of trauma becoming subconscious and unresolved. As we have already found; subconscious and unresolved trauma makes trauma even more difficult to navigate as it has the potential to manifest into maladaptive coping and secondary mental health issues on top of trauma symptoms which are already experienced.

It is a natural human Instinct to avoid pain (psychological or physical), however for a Warrior who has survived multiple complex trauma; either in developmental stages or later in adulthood – trauma blocking becomes an even more common tactic used in order to preserve and protect our own mind.

The emotional toll of individual event(s) may become too much to bear and manifest into avoidance of anything similar to past events. This avoidance behaviour – termed; trauma blocking – has the potential to cause individual issues in recovery; especially if left unresolved.

Trauma blocking is used by a trauma survivor to block out any painful, residual or overwhelming emotions perceived to be caused by original traumatic event(s). This behaviour can manifest as a protective measure where an individual may avoid certain stimuli altogether as a way of ‘forgetting’ the past.

Trauma blocking involves an individual attempting to dull and forget past trauma through (excessive) use of coping mechanisms. An individual who is blocking trauma may:

• Obsessively use social media – compulsively scrolling
• Using “down time” to binge drink, over/under eat (ignoring hunger ques)
• Compulsively exercise – have unattainable goals
• Remain within toxic relationships – long after expiry of relationship
• Obsessively/impulsively shop with no thought for budget and may lead to debt
• Become a workaholic – poor work boundaries – including being available 24/7

A survivor of trauma commonly uses accessible tactics to dull the intensity of pain within. This is usually an imperative issue with an addiction and reliance: trauma blocking will cause an individual to relapse when recovering from addiction or reliance on substances.

Generally speaking, an individual who is relying on substances to alter mood or memories (food, alcohol, drugs, prescriptions etc) will find the very memories they had successfully blocked out – return on becoming “clean”. The memories they have been using substances to block – return and causes huge Relapse rates as the individual builds at elements and requires more (of chosen substance) in order to feel “normal”. Over time, more substance(s) are required to dull the pain of the past and the cycle continues with a ferocity that is incredibly difficult to halt.

A survivor of trauma will numb the pain of the past in order to free themselves – however, as the brain has the ability to adapt and adjust; the compulsive behaviour begins to become necessary to continue and ceasing will cause an Avalanche of emotion to ensue. As time passes; the Avalanche grows and so we find prolonged trauma blocking to cause even greater issues as time progresses.

If course, trauma blocking behaviour will feel beneficial and effective at the time of using, one may be rewarded for overworking (bonuses etc) and receive momentary satisfaction. The gratification of such as relatively short-lived and as a positive feelings begin to subside, an individual must re-employ blocking behaviour in order to protect oneself from uncomfortable feelings or memories resurfacing.

The issue that is found in warriors who use trauma blocking is that temporary relief is felt from such behaviours and coping; the body and mind will continue to process the trauma in the background despite continued attempts to block the pain. Best war which pages within creates an absence of self reflection (including flashbacks, nightmares, panic attacks and intrusive thought) and although that is the intended goal – this absence of natural trauma reactions leads an individual to not fully process the event at its core.

In terms of recovering from trauma blocking behaviours – an individual must acquire awareness of such behaviours and how they manifest to maladaptive coping. What years of trauma would benefit from reflecting on the personal ways which blocking trauma negatively impacts ones life. Rating these Anna diary or log can switch the brain into reflection and make it easier to retain information to working memory. Once personal awareness has been gained; a survivor then has the opportunity to grow.

For a survivor of trauma who is recovering from trauma blocking behaviours; it can also be beneficial to plan in advance healthier ways to self soothe so when the moment comes in which a survivor may need to use search tools – they are easily accessed – even during anxious states. This is of course dependent on one’s ability to reflect on their own trauma blocking behaviours – for the individual using work to cope – they may plan; ” I will take 5 minutes to complete guided meditation when I am tempted to respond to a non-emergency out with regular working hours.”

As each individual trauma differs; each trauma blocking behaviour also varies and each reflection will be your own to navigate.

Finally, when coping and recovering from trauma blocking; it can be helpful to reflect on the prices you may pay by continuing trauma blocking behaviour and not dealing with the pain within.

If beginning this path or facing ones pain feels or seems too much – trauma informed therapists are helpful in guiding a warrior of trauma through reflection on each behaviour as well as helping deal with the pain of the past – asking for additional support is not something one should be ashamed of as it shows great courage and strength.

Our research group can be found here

Currently we are conducting research into the causes of trauma. I have included a link to the survey here : https://surveyheart.com/form/5f06e63b3ed8765392fe12d0

If you would be interested in taking part, please feel free. If you would like to share this study i would also welcome you to use the link, many thanks!

The flight response

The flight response

On Friday, I wrote about the fight response in relation to both developmental and interpersonal trauma. Today, I’m looking into the flight response and how that evolves as a go-to response in situations of perceived danger.

It is common for flight types to flee and hide from things which they cannot control. The flight response can make survivors feel that they are obsessively drawn to perfection as a form of safety and thus will force themselves to achieve, act and think in such rushed ways.

It can look like ADHD in children but can also come across as the “driven student” (Walker, 2014). The flight type response causes trauma survivors to feel constantly switched on; obsessively and compulsively driven to their goals. When a flight type is not (able to) they respond by overthinking, planning or dissociating through obsessive thought.

Walker (2014) calls this left brain dissociation. Where the individual uses constant thinking to distract themselves from an underlying fear of abandonment. Not only does the flight type constantly worry, but they are compelled to stay ahead of their goals in a rushed fashion.

(Whilst writing this, it becomes more apparent that I am writing about myself in some ways…)

It is common for a flight response type to become addicted to their own surges of adrenaline. Adrenaline is favoured because it helps the individual get everything done they need to and so can lead to risky behaviours such as placing oneself in dangerous situations so as to peak their adrenal spike. This is a maladaptive coping mechanism used by trauma survivors, but one which can spiral out of control and result in substance abuse, workaholism and OCD.

For trauma survivors, it can be easy to miss the signs of flight behaviour because we are constantly trying to stay one step ahead of even ourselves. It is common for flight behaviour types to keep ourselves so busy that we have no time for self-reflection or we have become too drained to attempt to after a full day of constant overthinking. In this instance, therapy can be beneficial as it would be at least 1 required hour out of the week which a survivor can be guided to positively self reflect and become more self-aware.

Knowledge about the different responses can aid a survivor who relies on flight response by increasing awareness and helping our ability to let go of our perfectionist demands.

When life becomes a forest of thought, it can become exceptionally easy to lose your way and fear the unsafety that it brings. It’s common for survivors who are flight types to prioritise the wrong things and lose sight of key issues. A flight response doesn’t necessarily mean you run away with your tail between your legs; just as a fight type doesn’t mean you have to physically hurt another. Flight responses happen in preparing for the worst – making sure they and their lives are as perfect as possible so to minimise the risk of danger.

When triggered to a flashback, survivors using flight responses can scatter to do meaningless activities or chores in order to merge into the background in a sense.

It can be difficult for an individual who relies on flight responses to do yoga and meditation, however, it is recommended in smaller stages. One would no doubt have to be mindful of sticking through the slower pace which can cause feelings of fear to surface. When we can manage a small minute long meditation we can progress to longer, eventually accessing our emotions in a controlled way.

It is important to note that over time, any of our 4f responses can generalize and cause issues with our daily lives as our fear response and perception of danger becomes oversensitive. As adults, we normalise this in order to deal with our maladaptive coping, however we become highly reactive to any type of perceived threat in our daily life and resort to this more often.

It is common for adult survivors to revert to addiction in order to dull emotions. Addiction (soft or hard) is used to reduce stress and the addictive substance will release endorphins to reduce cortisol. That makes it incredibly fast acting and all the more sought after. The higher cortisol levels in the body, the more an individual requires these endorphins and as the endorphin system begins to react to more and more situations of perceived danger, it causes us to rely more on the substance used. I would like to write more in-depth about addiction this week.

With constant stress hormones at high levels within your body through multiple traumas, it becomes a go to respond to quickly snap back to using a flight response. It can cause us to use energy we don’t have; as we plan, prepare and overthink every detail. As adults of trauma – we may have learnt that if we acted perfectly or “appropriately” – that we can control and minimise the intensity of abuse faced and this can carry on in our lives as a constant maladaptive reaction as we become more sensitive to stress. If left unchecked, the flight response can lead to addiction, eating disorders and OCD and can be difficult to navigate without the support of therapy.

When trauma becomes a disability.

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There may be various reasons why a trauma survivor is not able to enter the workforce; each as individual as the original trauma. As we continue to explore these reasons in further detail – I would like to also add some information on the options that are available for trauma survivors surrounding employment.

Cases of trauma can become so severe that it impacts individuals ability to enter, maintain and perform in a specific role ( some rules may cause triggers – while others may not).

Trauma symptoms tend to worsen if left unresolved and eventually manifest to secondary psychiatric disorders. In many cases, there is a fine line in ones quality of life and especially so for a survivor of trauma. As we have explored some common reasons a trauma survivor may face difficulties in the workplace, such subconscious triggers and workplace stressors can impact a trauma survivor so much that they have little to no quality of life and may suffer reduction in work-related performance as well as a decline in physiological and psychological health.

As trauma symptoms are left unresolved (-sometimes even due to fatigue preventing adequate reflection) they tend to worsen to a point that work may feel impossible; sick days increase as does the cycle of managerial intervention and increase of work stress (ultimately leading to avoidance, further increased absence, fractured employee relationships, physiological and psychological decline, an increase in illness and an increase in the risk of trauma symptoms manifesting to secondary disorders).

I personally have my own physical and psychological reasons as to why I cannot work. The issues that I faced we are too severe and difficult that my quality of life was severely impaired leading to a mental health crisis (or two…) as I rested and took absence: I’d find myself in some way feeling better – I would return to work and the cycle would continue.

Trauma symptoms led me to be terminated from Employment, ostracized and experiencing retraumatization as a result. I attempted different careers, I work in a bakery, a shop, as a carer, as a training officer for carer’s, as a classroom assistant and a pharmacy dispenser. Each role followed the same pattern and it became obvious – after a decade of trying: that I was going to end up dead at the expense of being a functioning member of society (and respected by others).

After a terrible role – I faced a lack of support, workplace bullying due to my age from older staff, being blamed for “taking things too personally” and cultivating in the same response given to a suicidal pupil – I broke. It was always instilled in me to keep my chin up and get on with it – work till you drop. Well, I dropped. I signed off sick and I never returned.

It was probably one of the kindest things that I have ever did for myself. As my physical mobility continues to decline; I can only imagine how things would be right now if I were still trying to work.

After my contract was terminated due to “lack of funding” (had they admitted it was mental health related – I would have more evidence as to why I couldn’t work) I enter job seekers as I was still deemed fit to work and I remained on that for around a year. One appointment, I spoke to the job coach and was finally honest about the issues I had and I was referred immediately to DLA (disability living allowance) which then change to PIP (Personal independence payment).

I didn’t know it was possible to claim for mental illness, however at the time I actually acquired more ‘points’ due to the way my trauma symptoms impact my day-to-day life; so much so that my mobility was overlooked during the assessment as it was taking so long to explain my psychological difficulties.

It is possible for a trauma survivor to qualify for PIP if their symptoms interfere with their ability to work.

Eligibility criteria for personal independence payment can be found here

PTSD is covered in the Equality Act 2010 and thus is a certifiable reason for an individual not being able to work. You can apply for PIP here

It is not guaranteed that PIP will be awarded as it is assessed on an individual basis through an independent assessor. However, when applied, you will receive a booklet asking to write how you are impacted on a day-to-day basis. The following areas are assessed with regards to individual ability to carry out and complete basic tasks in a reliable and timely manner (I am not going to enter into the basic politics surrounding this benefit or form, rather give an overview of an option you have a RIGHT to choose)

1. Preparing and cooking food
2. eating and drinking
3. managing treatment or health
4. washing and bathing
5. toileting needs
6. dressing and undressing
7. speaking to people
8. reading and understanding
9. mixing with others
10. making decisions about spending and managing money
11. planning and following a route
12. moving around
13. any other additional info which is relevant to claim

PIP will contact your GP to obtain a copy of notes to use while assessing your taste and you should receive a reply promptly. The decision can be appealed through mandatory reconsideration and the appeals process and many Volunteer services can help with this.

On our group; I have added various files in order to help those applying as well as a unit which covers employment issues due to trauma symptoms

Any member requiring assistant should contact Citizens Advice who can aid with filling this form – there are many volunteer groups which give specific advice and guidance on personal independence payment and employment support allowance as well as universal credit.

Contact details

Money matters

Citizens advice bureau

Facebook group – PIP specific

The effects of trauma and employment

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There are limited studies with regards to issues and employment following a traumatic event(s). However; it is highly common for survivors of trauma to face difficulties in entering the workforce; in maintaining their role and also within work related performance. Throughout this article I intend to explore some of the prominent issues faced by trauma survivors as a fundamental base for raising awareness of the effects of trauma on an individual’s daily life.

Having my own personal difficulties with employment; I have some experience of facing such issues however – as every trauma differs; the issues surrounding employment will follow suit.

Disclosure

The Health and Safety at Work Regulations (1999) requires employers to make risk assessments for employees. This takes into account psychological health and employers have a duty of responsibility to take reasonable care of employees. That is also to state that employers may be liable if subsequent traumatic event(s) occur that could be anticipated. Although this regulation has been in place for over a decade, it is still evident that employer awareness and employee disclosure is a huge cause for concern within the working environment (1). Nachmias states that employers awareness of trauma disorders is extremely low which ultimately may cause a trauma survivor not to disclose past abuse or trauma. The stigma which surrounds mental health may also contribute to lack of disclosure and the general lack of awareness of trauma issues and prevalence compounds this further.

Issues in disclosure of trauma are further affected due to the nature of trauma; those who have survived may not be able to admit they’re suffering.

Lack of disclosure is a survivors main defence mechanism which may have been constructed not only due to the nature of trauma itself but due to past experiences. Modern society tends to have a lack of understanding of trauma and how it affects individuals as well as being decorated an opinion, it can cause issues in disclosing past abuse or trauma.

At a personal level, a trauma survivor may feel vulnerable and at risk if they fully disclose trauma. As survivors of trauma construct new barriers and walls of protection; it could feel almost impossible to communicate.

The nature of trauma usually leaves of survivor in some way feeling to blame for the event(s). In such cases it can be extremely difficult to disclose trauma that has occurred or is still present in the background (narcissistic parents, domestic violence etc) – whether a trauma survivor was directly blamed or not. Difficulties in the disclosure of trauma are common due to the nature of abuse placing blame consistently on to the survivor.

For survivors who have attempted to disclose past trauma; they may be met with a workforce that does not have an adequate understanding of trauma. At times this may feel like a risk; when presented with the unknown, a trauma survivor may not be able to take that risk – especially if experience shows a negative outcome.

The fear of losing employment or relationships due to disclosure can also be a factor in non-disclosure. Many trauma survivors feel they will be further discriminated against for disclosing past trauma.

With regards to Disclosure, it is the employees responsibility to disclose (as regulations state). It is not the responsibility of the employer to make assumption or changes without clear disclosure. However; once disclosure has been achieved (if appropriate) it is then responsibility of the employer to notify HR and act appropriately. Many trauma survivors have a severe intolerance to that which they cannot control and so disclosing trauma may not occur due to a possible lack of control. This lack of control can feel like vulnerability and actually be triggering for a survivor.

Environmental issues

Environmental issues arise in the workplace for trauma survivors and vary from individual to individual; completely dependent on the trauma experienced. Environmental triggers include; noise hypersensitivity, hypervigilance, 4f response reliance and the environment producing specific triggers i.e; a colleague who me look or act in a way similar to past abuser(s) or been presented with emotions or situations similar to past abuse.

As triggers are so individual to trauma experiences it can be difficult to effectively list each one however more common environmental issues do arise in the workplace.

Hypervigilance

Hypervigilance in the workplace can be difficult to appease especially for employers who have little to no understanding of the term or how it may affect a survivor. Hypervigilance may come as a result of being told to sit with ones back to the door; where an employee feels a sense of threat or lack of control over their environment. (this can occur in any situation in which an individual survivor feels out of control, vulnerable and at personal risk i.e; a nurse having too much responsibility, police entering a violent or aggressive job, a call center employee facing customer criticism or aggressive language etc). An individual survivor who has secured employment will feel a severe lack of control within a position as it is the employers role to control the environment and workforce. Workplace dynamics enforces feelings of lack of control (which in itself can be highly triggering) and for survivors of trauma, control is extremely important within their lives as they may have once lacked control and suffered consequences; leading to regaining control and subsequent issues having to relinquish it again (in any form). For trauma survivors who are currently within a toxic relationship – this lack of control over all aspects of ones life can serve to tip an individual to crisis and maladaptive coping.

It is also important to highway hypervigilance as a result of power positions. Trauma survivors may become triggered at the “mere” gender of individuals in power. For those survivors of Childhood developmental trauma; employers may inadvertently trigger feelings of their past through their actions or gender. Individuals who have experienced domestic violence may become triggered due to an employer of the gender of previous toxic relationships and this may cause subtle perception difficulties and issues in personal reactions.

In many cases this is at a subconscious level and employees may face difficulties in which they do not fully understand (and thus have no control over). This can also follow suit in the workforce as difficulties can be magnified to a more intense level.

Noise

Noise can also cause hypervigilance in trauma survivors. Sudden sharp and unexpected noise can activate a trauma survivors survival response and produce feelings of extreme anxiety, agitation and fearfulness (“jumpy”).

A trauma survivor may be extremely sensitive to noise (hypercausis) and will experience normal working sounds as painful and jarring. A trauma survivors senses are heightened and so what may seem bearable may in fact be painful for a trauma survivor to experience. Sudden noises may also pose an issue in the workplace; somatic flashbacks may ensue due to particular noises being similar to what may have been processed in the past. Depending on individual working environment, noise can produce constant hypervigilance and stress reactions which can last the full working day and beyond. Been consistently activated me cause a survivor of trauma to avoid stimuli, work (high absence) and interaction as well as leading to Employment of 4F response and maladaptive coping. As time progresses the cycle of being triggered to hypervigilant states may increase absence rates or personal stress causing ill health and a poorer quality of life.

Each working environment is different and its own right and will produce personal triggers which me feel achievable to work through with support or may lead to an acute onset of trauma symptoms.

Working hours

The symptoms of trauma experienced is as individual as a trauma itself. Studies show that even individuals present during the same trauma faced very different responses and difficulties moving forwards (2). Individuals of complex and developmental trauma however generally have additional difficulties and regulation of emotion, maintaining connection and use of maladaptive coping. Please symptoms lead to extreme fatigue, Insomnia under overheating and obsessive coping (exercise, diet, OCD behaviour etc). The background symptoms (the symptoms that are personal and really explained) may lead to emotional or physical burnout and with regards to Employment, some working hours may be detrimental.

Work related tasks

It is common for survivors of trauma to face difficulties concentrating, staying on task and completing said task. This may be due to a lack of concentration (thoughts elsewhere) or through perfection driven behaviours.

Perfectionism is used by a trauma survivor in order to control their environment and others perception of them. This may have been developed through childhood developmental trauma where as a child, the survivor had to ensure as perfect behaviour as possible in order to dull the intensity of abuse. It is also common to experience perfectionism and obsessive traits due to adult interpersonal relationship abuse or trauma where individuals are taught their own character flaws are a result of abuse and so strive for perfection in all aspects of life.

Perfectionism and obsessive thought can cause problems in the workplace as tasks may take considerably longer or individuals may miss the bigger picture (can’t see forest for trees).

Entering the workplace can be beneficial to trauma survivors as it provides a sense of purpose and routine. However, not every survivor of trauma benefits from this and such structures can actually serve to be counterproductive and cause a plethora of issues leading to absenteeism and illness as well as causing retraumatization and acute onset of trauma symptoms.

Some of the main difficulties arise through lack of understanding and knowledge of which can only be attained by personal motivation. What survivors of trauma cause difficulties in disclosing abuse and being vulnerable and explaining what we perceive our biggest weakness. Intricate issues arise in the environmental stimuli work produces with a through control issues, noise levels, environmental/somatic triggers and gender triggers. Entering the workforce can actually cause The Downward Spiral of trauma symptoms and lead to severe issues and crisis at later points.

I would be very interested to know one’s experience within the workforce and any difficulties that might have arisen for you. This would help me to gather more information on some of the main causes of difficulties in the workplace for trauma survivors.

Our research group can be found here;
https://www.facebook.com/groups/2348717965433957/?ref=share

Currently we are conducting research into the causes of trauma. I have included a link to the survey here : https://surveyheart.com/form/5f06e63b3ed8765392fe12d0

If you would be interested in taking part, please feel free. If you would like to share this study i would also welcome you to use the link, many thanks!

References

1. Nachmias, s and Caven, v. (2018), hidden inequalities in the workplace: a guide to the current challenges, issues and business solutions.
2. Sansone, R. A., Dakroub, H., Pole, M., & Butler, M. (2005). Childhood trauma and employment disability. International Journal of Psychiatry in Medicine, 35(4), 395–404. https://doi.org/10.2190/3XUR-1PWJ-0DT3-BJFJ
3. Schneider JC, Trinh N-HT, Selleck E, Fregni F, Salles SS, Ryan CM, et al. (2012) The Long-Term Impact of Physical and Emotional Trauma: The Station Nightclub Fire. PLoS ONE 7(10): e47339
4. SANSONE, R.A., LEUNG, J.S. and WIEDERMAN, M.W., 2012. Five forms of childhood trauma: Relationships with employment in adulthood. Child abuse & neglect, 36(9), pp.676-679.

How trauma can effect the diagnosis of an eating disorder.

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An eating disorder is a serious mental health illness in its own right and is classified in the dsm-v based on an individuals maladaptive eating patterns, weight and BMI. The most common eating disorders include anorexia nervosa (AN), bulimia nervosa (BN), eating disorder not otherwise specified (EDNOS, now commonly termed other specified feeding and eating disorder OSFED) and compulsive overeating disorder (COED or binge eating disorder); however there are cross variations of each receiving current attention within the field of research.

As eating disorders are also commonly found within survivors of both complex and childhood trauma; research surrounding a possible link has begun to come forward. Although in its infancy, trauma researchers have found there to be a potential link between eating disorders as a comorbidity to trauma disorders. The possibility being that eating disorders are caused by trauma itself. Fruition of the latter would change the face of trauma and how eating disorders (and addictions) are treated.

Eating disorders have been researched in their own right and said to be caused by a complex combination of factors such as genetics, personality traits and environmental triggers; with frequent comorbidity of anxiety depression and OCD.

In depth analysis shows that individuals who have traits of hypervigilance, perfectionism, high-achieving, obsessive, impulsive or chaotic, negative self-worth, guilt, distress and low self-esteem. While the link between trauma and eating disorders is still developing, it can be easy to see why eating disorders are common within survivors of trauma.
As is seen in childhood developmental trauma and interpersonal trauma; survivors are often faced with many; if not all of these personality traits as a defence or coping mechanism. Professor van der Kolk has stated that if the dsm-v were to include developmental trauma as a mental health illness; it would have the potential to turn the dsm-v and icd-10 into a pamphlet; as many mental health conditions such as borderline personality disorder, ADD, ADHD, personality disorders, substance abuse and eating disorders would then be seen as symptoms of developmental trauma.

Each type of eating disorder can manifest due to prolonged maladaptive coping from trauma-related symptoms or events. Individuals use food to express emotions and distress and so coping with trauma can lead to an individual under or over eating in order to dissociate or dull emotions and fears. It is possible for an individual to fall outwith each of the described categories of diagnosis as well as experience multiple eating disorders at a time or throughout their lives.

Enduring trauma results in a loss of individual spirit. Where the survivor can rely on dissociation to remain separate from their experiences. During childhood and early development: there can be a joining of the mind with the ego where a child learns that an order to dull parental abuse or neglect they must create a perfect environment, ignore their own feelings and seek safety from ritual. This can also be the case for late-onset Complex trauma where survivors learn to behave in a certain way that it merges with their inner self.

The ego develops to crave more and is consistently dissatisfied causing an individual to use avoidance to retreat from pain or discomfort. During developmental trauma; children often resort to over pleasing their caregivers, even at the expense of their own needs and desires. It can manifest to the point that the child becomes the parental figure; Taking care of the needs of those who should be nurturing them. This lack of nurture follows a child through to adulthood where they often enter toxic or abusive relationships. This compounding of trauma (also seen in adult complex trauma) leads to an individual using food as a tool to fulfill the constant demands of the ego.

Food is often used by individuals in order to deal with uncomfortable emotions or events through control, dissociation and distortion of self. Lack of nutrients aids a survivor by dulling their heightened emotions and further enabling them to dissociate.

When you look at anorexia nervosa or bulimia nervosa and it’s associated traits of perfectionism and OCD, it tends to link directly with the flight response. As current research shows, a prolonged reliance on one of the 4F responses can manifest into OCD, generalized anxiety disorder, substance abuse or reliance and eating disorders.

To further this theory, binge eating characteristics generally fall in line with traits of the fawn and freeze response. The notion that eating disorders are caused by our symptoms of developmental and complex trauma would change the way we look at all mental illness as well as trauma itself.

With regards to recovery from an eating disorder focus is placed directly on restoring weight, education on nutrition, addressing body image and preventing future ill health as a consequence. Currently, with regards to eating disorder recovery; there is no focus on the traumatic childhood event(s) or developmental trauma(s) that may have caused it. Again, the blanket approach taken by the NHS of CBT and nutrition education fails in many instances to address trauma even in the minimalist of ways.

It is uncommon to visit a therapist in the first instance due to childhood trauma or interpersonal relationship trauma. Psychiatrists and psychologists usually assess patients in terms of their depressive symptoms, anxiety or OCD and eating issues. As CPTSD is only recently recognised, millions of cases could have gone unnoticed in terms of addressing core root trauma involved. For instance, it is common for eating disorder patients to state that an eating disorder never leaves, it can be controlled through awareness. What if this is because an eating disorder is a symptom of unrecognised/unresolved trauma?

Past research focused on eating disorders being caused by the Western capitalistic world or due to being passed on through Generations via genetics. If you look at generational trauma and developmental trauma as being because of this, it would change the face of therapy into a complete trauma informed approach. This would have the potential to resolve trauma and related symptoms for millions of individuals.

Furthermore inner beliefs said to be held by those with an eating disorder tend to mirror those same negative beliefs held by a trauma survivor. Inner beliefs faced by both trauma survivors and eating disorder sufferers include not feeling worthy or deserving of anything; where food represents ‘energy’; yin energy is nurturing, so the removal of that may seem normal for a trauma survivor. It is known that an individual’s beliefs come from parental figures that have nurtured such ways. At present, there is little research which identifies a link between childhood neglect, complex trauma and eating disorders.

An eating disorder becomes like an addiction. If you look at the description of bulimia; addiction could be substituted for each symptom. Addiction and reliance on substances (such as removal of food) is seen commonly as a reaction and coping mechanism to trauma. If a trauma survivor who uses or relies on substances (or food removal) when they are feeling low; they may also fabricate events or enter toxic relationships (self creation of negative events) in order to cause a ‘spike’ in their maladaptive behaviors (ie binge, purge, run, use drugs). For survivors of trauma it is also common to have difficulties in sitting with uncomfortable emotions. This has said to be due to the activation of the survival mode response. For an individual who has experienced complex trauma or developmental trauma, we know that the heightened survival mode activation produces reliance on 4F responses as it does on the maintenance of maladaptive coping.
Addiction and reliance has been researched and found to link and correlate with eating disorder related behaviour on some level. Having the knowledge that we do regarding trauma; it can be simple to see the potential link and future possibilities that may bring; especially if we view other mental illness in the same respect – with an open mind to the individual effects of trauma.

The main treatment goal for eating disorders is to assist in decreasing fear of food and increasing the connection to self. However: if the inner self has been compromised due to a life of abuse or repeated complex trauma, would a trauma survivor who has a comorbidity of an eating disorder be aware of this change to their self?

Furthermore, for trauma survivors, eating disorders can be easily missed. Especially if it is tangled in a web of a variety of symptoms and illness. As anorexia nervosa is not diagnosed until an individual reaches less than 85% of a healthy BMI for their range; it can have real implications for a trauma survivor in terms of recovery. An eating disorder in its entity sits at the very bottom of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, is recovery from trauma possible if there is an underlying reliance on removal of food or addictive behaviours?

I wonder where the future with regards to trauma may develop and the extra lives that such knowledge could help. With addition of an adequate trauma screening procedure within psychotherapy; trauma itself could be identified quicker leading to higher recovery chances and with addition of an appropriate policy in education and health; could actually reduce trauma for the generations that are currently rising.

If we continue to view eating disorders as an issue in attachment and trauma as research shows – eating disorder patients with ‘secure’ attachment have improved prognosis in treatment. From crossover with theorists in trauma – support is the biggest predictor of the impact of trauma and recovery.

I hope this article serves to open as many questions as it did for me. I personally an going to continue to actively research the notion that appropriate treatment screening and knowledge in early and healthcare systems – could change trauma in how it is approached and how it is further treated in the UK.

Our research group can be found here

Currently we are conducting research into the causes of trauma. I have included a link to the survey here : https://surveyheart.com/form/5f06e63b3ed8765392fe12d0

If you would be interested in taking part, please feel free. If you would like to share this study i would also welcome you to use the link, many thanks!

Enabling

Enabling is a pattern within a relationship where one partner ignores, excuses, justifies or denies their experiences to smooth over abuse or tension on a day-to-day basis. If we find ourselves within this dynamic, it can be difficult to understand as our thoughts become distorted in order to accept the behaviours portrayed by your partner’s or parents, friends or colleagues.

Enabling commonly manifests when we are in a relationship with someone who is out of control. Where we began to take on the responsibilities of the other at the expense of our own needs.

For trauma survivors, it can be common to unknowingly enable anothers behaviour whether that be addiction (incl soft addiction), acceptance of poor relationship performance or money management. The enabled person will usually describe themselves as a victim and with this in mind, it can be understandable why survivors of trauma do everything in their power to alleviate that feeling. As simply put as having a subconscious desire to never allow someone to feel the way we did and so ‘over loving’ to the point we normalise and deny we are allowing such behaviour.

It is when we begin to confuse helping with enabling that we see a shift in power and surge in even further behaviours within the relationship. However, many adult survivors of Childhood neglect would have enabled their parents or caregivers poor parenting for fear of parental retaliation and this approach becomes normal in future adult relationships.

Enabling is also found as an issue within complex trauma, whereby an individual may have been forced to enable in order to minimise abuse. This relationship dynamic results in a system where the enabler becomes compelled to organise their own behaviour and needs around the choices of the enabled. I would thus interpret it as a fawn response to adverse power dynamics.

Being in a situation remotely similar to past abuse or trauma will bring up emotional, somatic and physical flashbacks as well as switch on our 4f responses. I read some research which points at each survival response being linked to childhood developmental stages: and so it is very possible that the fawn response and enabling behaviours are built within us from our past traumas or childhood.

I don’t see enabling as a conscious negative decision on the part of the enabler, I’ve yet to see a case where the enabler is ok or happy with what occurs. On the contrary, it can and does produce anxieties, shame, guilt and self-destructive behaviours for survivors of trauma and childhood developmental neglect.

Enabling comes from a place of “over loving” and love, it is an ineffective way to solve relationship issues as we become stuck in a role where we begin to feel unheard and unworthy; it’s throws us back daily to how we felt during past trauma. Enabling ultimately causes a pattern to form within this new relationship that doesn’t help either side and makes it less likely that the enabled will change their behaviour.

The only way we can stop enabling is by transferring responsibility back to the person it belongs to. As trauma survivors, its important to take responsibility for our own behaviour – which we analyse and change on an almost daily basis, we should therefore expect that if we can change our responses that it should be possible if not at times easier for the enabled to do the same. It does come down to personal motivation and by ceasing enabling you will find a pull or see contest from those who once benefited in the past by our over loving nature.

It’s important to enter into new relationships with our own set of boundaries and safe coping. This is our armour as survivors of past trauma. It is important to keep in mind that just because you stop enabling, doesn’t mean you stop loving. In fact, it means that you begin to love and empower yourself too.

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The Trauma Bond

We become codependent as toddlers and quickly learn how our responses affect our caregivers. If that relationship is maladaptive; it will change our fundamental neural pathways and behaviours as adults. We may find, as Walker States within; “Complex PTSD; from surviving to thriving”, that as young children we quickly learned that protesting abuse only leads to more frightening parental retaliation. In that case, our fight response is relinquished and we become codependent or trauma bonded (walker, 2014).

Trauma bonding also occurs within adult complex trauma as we are taught within the relationship that fighting against the toxicity only results in more unwanted stress and more intense instances of abuse.

Trauma bonding is extremely subtle and replaces valid questions with false emotions and answers.

Trauma bonds ultimately manifest due to a fear of abandonment. It is due to the concept of fear that we face an inability to express needs, rights and boundaries in relationships. This causes a struggle to be assertive within interpersonal relationships and our fight system kicks in as we seek safety and acceptance.

Trauma bonding makes for a one-sided toxic relationship where an individual would rather listen than talk, agree rather than disrupt or to offer care than ask for help (Walker, 2013); memorising my list of rights which is found in files within the group will greatly help within this type of relationship and response.

It is through education about a parents role in an individual’s life that can truly aid recovery (walker, 2013). This helps to buffer guilt and shame we have built within and trust in our judgement within future interpersonal relationships.

When we find ourselves within a relationship dependent on trauma bonding, we become emotionally attached to an abuser (harley therapy online). It is a negative bond which keeps you loyal and subservant to a destructive cycle.

Trauma bonding will make us feel powerless and unable to move forward. There are periods when we question if we even like or trust the other as we become stuck in a relationship which is intense and complex. It’s easy to focus on the minimal good days we have, even if it was 2 weeks and 3 days ago – that is because due to the dynamics of our relationship drama, the good days are extremely minimal, so when they do occur; they become hormonally charged and easier to access in the form of detailed memory.

It is also common within this dynamic to believe you can change the other. That is because at times they have shown you a glimmer of hope in a positive direction. Remember, they have chosen to show you that just as they have chosen not to at times.

When it comes to cutting ties with this relationship, it produces feelings of extreme fear and anxiety. It is almost like a phobia to leave. Leaving a relationship you are traumatically bonded to can make you feel like you’re going to be sick or even as extreme to feel as if you don’t stay your life will be destroyed.

When we realise that we are traumatically bonded to someone; we have to change that dynamic completely. If it cannot be worked through in therapy and be adequately supported, it should be ended when possible; as terrifying as that is.

Trauma bonding is often found in parent-child relationships, relationships where we are verbally criticised, manipulated, and in relationships with an alcoholic or drug addict.

Traumatic bonding, described by Harley therapy as complex in its own right and should only be explored through the support of a counsellor due to its challenges which can be subtle in nature. Is the number one reason why many of his victims stay within the abuse cycle that can be exceptionally difficult to navigate without external support and guidance. In addition, I have made a graphic in order to show some common thoughts that many individuals who experience this also have.
For additional information, there is a unit within our Facebook group that goes into this in greater detail.

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Why we stay.

Why we stay in relationships that are toxic and how we can cope within them.

I am writing this from the perspective of developmental trauma (in childhood) and interpersonal relationship trauma (c-ptsd through relationships in adult life), not from a single type 1 trauma (PTSD from car accident), this is not a theoretical article however from real life experiences.

We may have been in that relationship that really feels like it is sucking the life out of us at times and it is highly common that survivors of complex trauma enter and remain in further toxic relationships following initial previous traumas.

This has some serious consequences for trauma survivors as it is common to begin to straddle the halfway mark between being and feeling like a survivor and being a victim once again. This can cause a whole range of issues from becoming revictimised and compounding our previous traumas into a web of confusion – “what memory fits there?”, “who was the abuser?”, “what year was that?”. As well as subtle emotional flashbacks, dissociation and a great reduction in self care. Survivors of trauma can travel from being in a place where they may have started to recover however, can feel that the similarity of this situation serves to attack with an acute intense onset of a trauma symptoms that may stay as long as they do.

A toxic relationship is not just a relationship we have with our partners, wives or husbands. It includes our family, our friends, our coworkers and even a Healthcare relationships such as a psychologist, nurse, surgeons etc.

There are many valid reasons why we as survivors of abuse already stay within these types of relationships and why we seem to allow them to prevail even at the expense of our own health. I’ve added all of this information into unit 4 within the group because sometimes we just aren’t ready to leave, that’s not to say that will always be the case.

How can we leave if we don’t understand the relationship we are in is actually toxic. I have saw many individuals remain within a toxic relationship because the type of abuse being experienced wasn’t perceived to be as traumatising as past abuse endured. It can be frightening to leave a type of crazy you know the signs of when escalating, to become attached to a relationship which is unknown and thus not controlled in any way.

When survivors have been neglected and abused as children; it becomes their inner voice and critic. The current toxic relationship can feel normalised and abuse diminished because: “it’s what my parents did, it must be normal”. When we have already suffered years of trauma, we feel a great deal of guilt and shame putting the needs of others far before our own. This can be really challenging in itself to recognise.

Complex trauma is described by top trauma specialists as being common in related issues such as: attachment, abandonment, lack of self-respect or care, denial, minimisation, codependency and facing a stubborn inner critic. It can be easy to see a potential minefield of reasons why we as veterans of past abuse endure further abuse without leaving.

It can feel too much to have to deal with all of these background issues as well as navigate the abuse cycle and that’s ok. The realisation that our personal relationship is toxic can activate the recovery model. keep in mind some “here and now” coping skills until you have the ability and means to leave.

The first step to changing anything is awareness and acceptance, moving on to realising their particular tactics or types of abuse and beginning to respond to these in ways beneficial to own health.

I wanted however to share some information I have found regarding what you could do if you can’t leave or if you choose to stay.

Denying the relationships existence either by dissociation or by blocking them or avoiding are resistance tactics which can damage your recovery from trauma. However, I do find when navigating toxic relationships, that this can be of short-term immediate benefit i.e. muting your phone during an altercation that has turned abusive. Self-preservation is absolute key, if you have to mute notifications in order to calm down or reflect more appropriately then this is the approach for you. Follow your gut instinct, as hard and as difficult as that is.

Refrain from telling lies to please the relationship. Although this may feel appropriate in the short-term, it only serves to create THEIR reality which they make poisonous to you. Not only this, but lying even to appease a situation and even in the smallest of manner is extremely stressful for most humans. The underlying stress will be felt and perhaps misinterpreted and it will not reduce toxicity within the relationship.

Within relationships we must find a solution for the anger that will arise. It’s completely normal for a human to feel the need to protect, especially for those who have already had to protect their lives and wellbeing during past trauma. It can become the only “go-to” reaction. As trauma survivors, we have interpersonal difficulties with our survival mechanism (4fs) and this can cause issues within relationships when dealing with conflict.
Make your anger plan before you get to that situation – I.e; when I feel THAT feeling – I will acknowledge it and take control by the removing myself or by writing down my feelings. When I am faced with toxic anger – I will respond as a broken record – repeating the same phrase until either one calms. Whatever safety plan or anger coping mechanism works for you, use and stick with.

It is important to remember you cannot solely fix a toxic relationship no matter if it is due to our own unchecked trauma responses or a partner, family member, employee or teacher. you can only control your reaction and not that of others.

As well as having a mental safety plan for how to respond to a toxic relationship, it can also be important to keep a bag packed in case of having to leave your home quickly. This would include; money (cash), passport, driving licence, bank details, list of emergency contacts – written separate in case of issues with mobile, change of clothes, underwear, medicine if taken (enough to last 3 days), general first aid items, snacks and water, distraction (adult colouring, book, music) – if you have children include the same for each child. This is so that if it came to it you could leave within 5 minutes.

If you are struggling to leave, you can still access support. We as a group can signpost you to exactly where you need to go without you making a mark on your internet history or phone.

There are various posts within the group to help you with your relationship safety. Establishing safe boundaries and coping is the main way to break free from toxic relationships when you feel able to.

Please remember to reach out to us if you need to.

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